Theatre folks love a good love story, both onstage and offstage. While there are some beautiful and lasting love stories, such as Audra McDonald and Will Swenson, there is an equal number that end in heartbreak, such as Sutton Foster and Christian Borle. I’m still not over that one.
There is a risk anytime we foray into the dating world, but it’s even greater if you, as the expression goes, “poop where you eat.” So, if you are considering seeking romance in a stage setting, you may want to weigh the positives and negatives.
Here are some of the pros and cons of dating a fellow member of the theatre:
Pro: You can play the songs from your new show repeatedly, and while they may want to rip their ears off, they are more likely to understand.
Con: An overabundance of feelings. All. The. Time.
Pro: Someone will understand the pressure of Tech Week and the insanity it causes, so they won’t just think you’ve turned into a mental case.
Con: There can be an underlying sense of competition that creeps in when one of you scores a leading role and the other doesn’t.
Pro: You can rehearse your scenes and discover your characters’ motivations together.
Con: You both spend a lot of time on something that may not make you any money at the end of the day. The struggle will be very real.
Pro: They are less likely to get jealous watching you in a romantic scene with someone else.
Con: Jealousy. Yes, this can also be a con. It is hopefully just acting, but sometimes you can’t help it when you see your partner being romantic with someone else. Unfortunately, feelings aren’t always logical.
Pro: You can talk about the show ad nauseam and they won’t just stare at you blankly.
Con: You may find yourself cast in different shows and on opposite schedules, so it can be difficult to find time for each other.
Pro: You get to watch each other be brilliant onstage. It’s as much a proud moment as it is a turn-on.
Con: Weekend and sometimes holiday unavailability.
Pro: You can support each other through the marathons that are auditions. It’s always nice to have a partner who can double as a cheerleader and a coach.
Con: Fights can quickly spiral given all of the dramatic potential in the room, especially if one or both of you are capable of crying on cue.
Pro: Very little fazes you both. Changing in front of strangers? Piece of cake. Swearing? Heard it all. Dirty humor? You could write a book.
Con: There’s no separation of church and state, especially if you are in the same show. You are together A LOT. And it can be hard to separate your personal life from the show. Issues from the theatre can get dragged home.
Whether the relationship ends up being the love of your life or goes up in flames faster than dry grass in the dead heat of summer, you will hopefully have discovered a new part of yourself along the way. So take your shot, explore and find someone who sets your heart on fire as much as being onstage does.
Have you ever dated someone in the theatre? What are the pros and cons? Let us know in the comments below!