It’s An Art

Song Title : It's An Art

Show Name : Working

Character Name : Dolores Dante

Gender : Female

Age : Young Adult, Adult

Vocal Part : Alto

Range : A3-D5

Style : Uptempo (Waltz)

Mood : Proud, Empowering

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Context & Lyrics


Dolores Dante is a waitress who boasts the joys of her job.

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There’s some as don’t care
When they put down a plate
There’s a sound
Not with me
When they move a chair
It’ll scrape with a grate
On the ground
Not with me

I will have my hand right when I place a glass
Notice how I stand right as customers pass
Serve a demi-tass with a gesture so gentile
Or do it again ’til
It’s near oriental

Da da da da dum dum

It’s an art it’s an art
To be a fine waitress
To see that you pleasure each guest
There’s a twist to my wrist
If I let a fork drop
Or cut up a porkchop
Or serve a New York chop
It all needs be stylish and smart
That’s what makes it an art

I remember one day
As I do now and then I had shakes
And down I went
There with my tray
Full of seven prime tenderloin steaks
And down I went

But I kept my poise – not one guest heard me fall
Never made a noise – not one noise food and all
If you have to crawl you give ’em what they like
You carry your tray like
It’s almost ballet-like

La la la la la la la la la la la la la la

It’s an art, it’s an art
To be a fine waitress
Each evening I treasure the test
Though my chef may be deaf
I stay diplomatic
If I give him static
He might burn the haddock
Or put too much salt in a tart
Even that is an art

Tips? HA!
Tips are important
For people like captains and barmen
For them it’s a tips, see?
For me, I’m a gypsy
Just toss me a coin
And I suddenly feel like I’m Carmen

So on through the ulcer
The backache, the hot, sweaty feet
On you go
Through, “Is your knife dull, sir?”
And, “Madam wants what with her meat?”
On you go

Two AM approaches, the curtains descend
There among the roaches my act’s at an end
Every night I tend to find myself crying
There’s no work so trying
Or so satisfying

I tell everybody that I’m a waitress and I’m proud.
Somebody comes up to me and says, “Hey you’re terrific.
How come you’re just a waitress?” Ya know what I say to them?
I say, “Why? Don’t you think you deserve to be served by me?”

It’s an art

GUESTS
Miss!

WAITRESS
It’s an art

GUESTS
Miss!

WAITRESS
To be a great waitress

GUESTS
Please take care of this

WAITRESS
To do without leisure or rest

GUESTS
Could we have our check please?

WAITRESS
So I zoom

GUESTS
Miss!

WAITRESS
Through the room

GUESTS
Miss!

WAITRESS
With a flair no one else has

GUESTS
Bring some more of these

WAITRESS
An air no one else has
I swear no one else has
My lilt

GUESTS
Miss!

WAITRESS
When I say

GUESTS
Miss!

WAITRESS
“A la carte”

GUESTS
And another order to go

WAITRESS
You can see it gives me a glow

GUESTS
My plate, miss!
My cup, miss!

WAITRESS
Ev’ry time I prove I’m a pro

GUESTS
I’m late, miss!
Hurry up, miss!

WAITRESS
Maybe I’m not quite

GUESTS
Miss!

WAITRESS
Michelangelo

GUESTS
And a bag for my dog

WAITRESS
But I’m not just a waitress

GUESTS
You were great

WAITRESS
I’m a one

GUESTS
But I’m late

WAITRESS
Woman

GUESTS
My check please
My change please

WAITRESS
Show

GUESTS
C’mon please
Lady, let’s go

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